Scared

Well, here we are, the night before surgery. I'm not exactly sure how to say a proper goodbye to the ladies. I just keep looking down. It's going to be super strange to wake up with a flat chest. Woah. This is it.

Today was craptastic. First of all, I slept three hours last night because I was pretty anxious. We woke up early, then showed up to the hospital at 8:30am to "register." We expected this to take all of one hour to set up a payment plan and talk with the anesthesiologist. HOWEVER, haha, we should have known better. The mafia mofos behind the desk pulled a grand heist and SEVEN arduous hours later, our negotiating powers had withered into dust and we handed over the plastic. I won't even go into how screwed up the medical system is in this country, or how the billing department lacks any remote sense of compassion for human life, but believe me I have a mouthful. Well, at least after all this we headed out to a Peruvian restaurant with my mom's friends and had a grand ol' time for a short while, and ate delicious ceviche.

I'm scared, but in the most irrational way. I'm tired and I can't sleep. I feel so much love around me, and it's all I need right now. I'm holding it close to my heart.