I'd rather be...
- Basking in ablution, nightswimming in a placeless pool, on a warm summer night, with my ethereal, long locks floating in the water
- Fifteen pounds slimmer, in a bikini, soaking in some rays on a Costa Rican beach eating a warm, juicy, ripe mango freshly picked from that tree over there, juice dripping down my face
- Smoking a cigarette and drinking a cold beer, anywhere, saying fuck it all with a smile on my face
- Sitting next to the radiator, drinking mediocre black tea, one lump of sugar, crossing the Bosphorus by slow ferry on a crisp, sunny winter's day admiring the view out the window
These times are trying for me. And for everyone within a five-foot radius. Most of the time I'm feeling like I've got this thing licked. Then there comes another bucket of water right over my head. It's really not a big deal, I suppose. I'm done with that first three months of chemo. For the second three months, I was planning to partake in the ALLTO medical study, a dual-therapy trial specific to the type of breast cancer I had. Rewind to a few months ago, there was a CT scan that found a nodule on my thyroid (which are very common, though mine is quite large). So, I've been waiting and waiting and waiting to see an endocrinologist, the waiting based on insurance hobblegobble. I *finally* was able to get an appointment for July 24 so in due process this back-burner minutiae was supposed to disappear into the rearview mirror, in my little fantasy brain thought. Well, the message was relayed to me today that in order to do this study they are requesting a biopsy on this nodule. Biopsy - an acquaintance of the C word. Can someone please get me out of this box of hell?!
My oncologist had previously mentioned that I couldn't do the thyroid biopsy after I started the chemo, and although she wanted me to see a specialist, she said it probably wasn't a big deal. And she doesn't think it's cancer because breast cancer does not metastasize to the thyroid. Anyway, the relayed message infers that she gave the go-ahead for the biopsy so I guess it's not a biggie. I am also scheduled to have my three-month EKG in the morning. Here's to hoping for good results! *clink*
Where there is a will, there is a way...
ReplyDeleteAs you understand, these are not my words. I quated from a book.(Celo is not going to believe but it is true:-)
Anyway, its simple to understand for me these simple english words.:-) thats why I choosed them. But also they give many hints for our hard times...Keep going on having your "will"
Tay tayy